Die grosse Chauvi-Seite für echte Männer

Taryn Southern steht wohl auf Fäkalhumor, liebt eingängige Musik und durchwachsene Texte, trinkt sicher viel Bier und haut Dich bestimmt sogar noch beim Rülpswettbewerb weg. Dabei sieht sie so unscheinbar süss aus, wie das nette Mädel aus der Nachbarschaft.

Coffee Makes Me Poo – bei mir funktioniert das …

LYRICS:

I wake up in the morning
feelin’ kinda bloated
there’s a pressure in my belly
hell, let’s not sugar coat it

I’m all backed up
and I need to take a poo
but there’s no release in sight
I don’t know what to do.

So I eat lotsa veggies
and fiber cereal
But nothin’ will dispose
Of all my raw material

So I make myself a cup,
sixteen ounces of joe,
and just like magic,
it starts the flow
CHORUS:

Gotta poo, I gotta really poo, a cup of joe always helps it all pass through, My poo, my poo, my poo

VERSE 2:

Yo, I aint the only one
Who know coffee makes you poo
Listen to the experts
Cuz what they say is true

According to wiki
When you drink in moderation
Due to paristalsis,
Coffee prevents constipation

Britney Spears and Rachel Zoe,
Mary Kate and Lindsay Lo
Wanna know how they stay thin
Coffee pushes out what’s in

I’ll never understand
why people choose to quit
when coffee tastes so good
and it helps you take a sh*t

CHORUS:

Gotta poo, I gotta really poo, a cup of joe always helps it all pass through, My poo, my poo, it’s true

BRIDGE:

Now at 8am
if I’m feeling kinda bloaded
I make my coffee fully loaded
By 9 am I’m ready to explode(d)…….

CHORUS:

Gotta poo, I gotta really poo, a cup of joe always helps it all pass through, My poo, my poo, my poo

Gotta poo, I gotta really poo, a cup of joe always helps it all pass through, My poo, my poo, my poo

Von ihr stammt auch das “Wrong Hole”. Ein gradioses Stück Musikgeschichte, nur gut, dass meine Eltern kein Englisch können …

Touch Your Boobies (I Touch Mine!) Brüste, Brüste, Brüste – ein Stück für mehr Bewusstsein bei der Vorbeugung von Brustkrebs also Mädels: touch your boobies!

LYRICS:

Big ones, small ones, flat and flappy,
So many boobies for me to grabby,
They come in all colors, sizes, and shapes,
Some like pears and some like grapes.

Young and old, round and wide,
Real and fake, and off to one side.
There’s boobies of all different kinds
But do you know the warning signs….

CHORUS:
I touch my boobies
For any strange lumps
I touch my boobies
For any weird bumps

Touching is key
To being lumpy free
So please touch your boobies
Please touch your boobies for me.

BRIDGE:
You can do it in the kitchen
Or while you’re in the shower,
You can do it at the bus stop, (pool?)
Or during happy hour.

You can do it in your car
Or while you grocery shop
You can do it while your run
You can do it nonstop….

You can touch your boobies anywhere
I don’t care if people stare
Cuz the most important thing to me…
Is are your boobies cancer free….

CHORUS:
So touch your boobies
For any strange lumps
Touch your boobies
For any weird bumps

Touching is key
To being lumpy free
So please touch your boobies
Please touch your boobies for me.

So please touch your boobies
Please touch your boobies for me.